Happy Father’s Day

After three weeks at home it’s that time again, time to head back to Davis. These few weeks in San Francisco have been filled with…Muni rides and trips downtown. Even Chinatown with my family, my mom, Nicole, and Chris. Separately. (To Julianne. You know, naps. Separately. Haha.)

I also haven’t spent this much time with my dad since…never. My dad was always the breadwinner of our family; my mom was the one that took care of us at home. Circumstances change. Changes I wouldn’t have ever imagined. Growing up you think your dad is invincible. So strong. I remember finally looking at my dad after that one summer, really looking at him. He looked…frail. I wanted to cry right there in the middle of the dim sum restaurant. I didn’t, but it made me think where was I this whole summer? This year? I’ve seen him going in and out of the hospital. I’ve seen him at home. It was also the summer my mom deemed me old enough to confide in, not just merely there in the background (I was always around.) when she talked with other adults. It’s one thing to see your mom worrying and venting with others and another to see her cry while talking with you…I sure was in some state of denial.

Things are back to a semblance of normalcy. My dad is well, but he’s been the one at home now. With his help and patience, I finally have my license. It’s funny. For the longest time my answer to the recurrent question, “Would it be easier to tell your mom or dad?” was without hesitation, my mom. She is the one that raised me at home and the one that I’ve spent the most time with after all. My dad and I didn’t talk much either. Recently my answer has changed. doesn’t matter. My dad has surprised me. He was the one that told me the things I needed to hear. The one that gave me a hug. In a physically unaffectionate family, it choked me up. Thinking about everything, it still does.

I love you dad. I endeavor to, one day, have a smidgen of your strength.

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8 comments
  1. jules said:

    i do know! a joint trip to chinatown, like a communal nap, would be weeird ;)

    you never really told me what happened at home that summer, but this was lovely to read. i’m also so glad to have met your parents, who are both so welcoming, kind, and i now know — strong. you have more than a smidgen of all that in you! if you ever get the chance to, please let your parents know i’m forever grateful for their hospitality and will think of them whenever i think of SF!

    • Anna said:

      Haha did I ever tell you about one of my backpacking trips? One of our tents got soaked, it was raining, before we got to our campsite. We were packed like sardines into one tent.

      Awww thanks dear <3

      • jules said:

        you did! i don’t remember why/where/when you told me, but it sounds familiar. two weekends ago, my sisters and i moved our mattresses into the living room, lined them up and pretended we were having a sleepover party. not quite like sardines, but it was cosy :D

        pssst and are you obsessing over any shopping right now? somebody’s 23rd birthday needs to be celebrated and i’d love to get you something on your wishlist! not as good with sweet surprises as you are!

        • Anna said:

          Haha you guys are so cute! You had room for three mattresses in your living room?!

          Awwwww thanks! <3 Lucky (sort of :P) for you after years of being asked this question, I'll give in aha. Hmm how about a necklace? Like a simple gold necklace or something on a longer chain like a compass or key or what have you. I still think it's the thought that counts, so don't sweat it! :)

  2. Anna said:

    Wait…or did you want me to be more specific?

    • jules said:

      yup it was a squeeze but we made it fit!

      if you have something sitting in your etsy basket (or any other shopping cart, really), just email me!! no point playing guesswork when you’ve got a guaranteed winner :D

      • Anna said:

        Haha reminds me of the time me and my old roomie camped out in the living the whole summer, it was way cooler in the living room than our room.

        Aww thanks! Will email you soon. :D

  3. Tiff said:

    Thanks for sharing :) This is a really honest and touching piece.

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